ANGTORIA Interview with Sarah Jezebel Deva - Vocals Interview Date: January 29, 2007 Interview conducted by: Clare B. Listen to this Interview || mp3

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Though the musicians who make up UK-based Antoria are not newcomers to the Metal scene, Angtoria is a fairly new band (NOT side project). Falling somewhere between Symphonic/Melodic Metal, Angtoria's debut, "God has a Plan for us all," is creating bigger waves than the band anticipated. Despite some schedule mishaps, I got a chance to sit down and chat with frontwoman Sarah Jezebel Deva before Cradle of Filth's soundcheck (she's been a semi-member of CoF for years and years, among other bands). Thanks to Sarah for her time and Hannah Raymond for setting this up.

SARAH:  I don’t know how much time I’ve got. I don’t want to be rude, but we’re going to have to rush this because I can’t let anything clash with this [soundcheck]. And the fact that certain people are being more supportive [of Angtoria] than I expected them to be kind of helps. And excuse the filthy, dirty look. We’ve got to go and do V.I.P. signings in a minute and it’s like [sighs] and the shower upstairs leaks, so we’re going to wait and not wash and do it tomorrow.

CB: You know what? I don’t have an excuse for for looking dirty; I’m not on tour [Sarah laughs]. But yeah, that response has been really overwhelming to your album. Were you surprised about that?

SARAH:  See, I don’t know how overwhelming it’s been. I know that every time I go online, we get compliments constantly, especially from America and Canada. But you might read ten comments in a day and it still doesn’t mean that you’ve sold that much—it doesn’t mean anything. All I hope is that people continue to like it and people continue to talk about it and people continue to buy it, because without the record sales promoters won’t want to book us and they won’t give a shit about us. So give it time. It’s only been out since November, and I do understand that people are still finding it very hard to find it, but I’m happy. I’m happy that people are buying it and they’re not ignoring it. I’m really greatful for that. And as for the ‘overwhelming’ bit, I suppose when I read some of the comments people write, that’s overwleming. But we won’t know what we’ve sold in the US and Canada until probably another few months, so I’m just waiting for that. And I’m hoping, I really, really hope, that somehow we’ve shifted like ten, fifteen thousand, but that’s optomistic. But for a first-time band, I’m happy if we’ve sold a hundred.

CB: What are your opinions about the album, are you happy with it?

SARAH:  You know, I think most musicians, when they listen to something they’ve done, in the beginning it’s fresh, it’s new. Then a few months later you’ve digested it and you start to rip it to bits. And then a few months down the line after that, you start to think, ‘Oh, it’s not all bad, is it?’ It’s how people do people like it. And you’re constantly your own judge; you constantly criticize everything that you do. So now, I listen to it and I think it’s good. I think, and you listen to every aspect of the music, it’s so well put together and so well orchestrated, but because I wouldn’t say—I don’t know, I AM a perfectionist. I understand that there’s always somebody better than me. I understand that I can never get too big-headed or take my job for granted. So I sometimes look and think I’m the weakest part of it all. But then, I think that’s natural for a musician, to criticize everything that you do. So although I am proud of it—very proud of it—I look upon the next album to be, hopefully, much better than the first. We’ll see.

CB: So what do you think the future will hold for the band, musically?

SARAH: Again, that’s a difficult question to ask, because it’s a dream, isn’t it? It’s like, you hope that you’re going to be doing huge shows and everyone’s going to love you and the press are going to love you and they’re going to treat you with respect and judge you for the music that they hear and see, and they’re not going to pick stupid little things, like for instance your weight, or your height or if you’ve got glasses. You hope that people are just going to say nice things, but realistically that never happens. There’s always going to be people that hate you. There’s always going to be people out there that haven’t got a clue what they’re doing and they’re just going to bitch you off. You’ve got to be prepared for that. I’d like to say, yeah, that we’re going to be huge, but time will tell. It all depends on sales; it all depends on if we can connect to peoples’ ears. So give it time. Like I say, it’s only been out since November; hopefully this time next year we can have enough record sales behind us to actually have some money to go on tour and do some shows. And that’s the dream, so we’ll see.

CB: Have you started writing at all for another album?

SARAH: No, but I’ve got ideas in my head and I’ve already put those ideas across to Chris [Rehn, guitar] and Tommy [Rehn, guitar] and discussed things with Dave [Pybus, bass] and stuff. I don’t know whether we’re going to do a full-length next or if it will be a mini-album. But we spent so long building up all the fans and the press and getting them on our side—and MySpace has been absolutely amazing for that—but it’s all about money, again. I think people seem to think that the money just falls out of the sky and it doesn’t, because it’s got to come from somewhere. And the record company that we’re on is [Listenable] is very small, so the money is very limited. It’s not Roadrunner or Century Media. And hopefully, we can do something this year so people don’t forget us. I mean, I already have titles in my head for things, I have ideas about how I want it to be, but again, it’s money. It’s money, it’s time—there’s also the fact that me and Dave are really busy with Cradle [of Filth] this year, but hopefully we can get another album out. We’ll start recording late summer and get it out late this year, beginning of next—I hope. I don’t want it to be any later than that because there’s new bands coming up all the time, so I don’t want anyone to forget us.

CB: How did the music come together on this album? Who was the main song writer?

SARAH: Chris wrote a large, a very large percent of the music. And the reason being is that, when me and Chris got together, we were doing my solo album which was going to be like a movie score-type thing. It wasn’t going to be a touring band, it was just going to be me and Chris. And the music that we wrote was amazing, you know, but noone would sign it because it wasn’t marketable. And all the links we had were with Heavy Metal companies, so we decided to wait a bit and see what would happen. We did get two offers but they were, to be honest, rubbish. We would have ended up getting something like ten cents per album, and we never would have got any money back from what we were doing so we could possibly do another album. So we thought, ‘Okay, we’re going to do a band anyway.’ The plan was to do my solo project first and then do an album. So we thought, ‘Right, we’ll just bring the band closer to reality, so we’ll do the band now and forget about the side project for a while.’ And basically, I think the side project is just gone, now, because we’ve used two of the songs from the solo project in Angtoria, now. So now Angtoria is the main thing, and we still have three more songs that we’re going to add, hopefully on the next album or something like that. So yeah, in the beginning it was a solo project, mostly written by Chris. His brother Tommy did all the production and helped out a lot there as well, and he actually wrote “The Awakening,” which was on the solo project and is also the opening track for the Angtoria album. So now that’s the main focus, basically, Angtoria is now the band and that’s how that all came about. And Tommy wrote a lot of the music as well, for “God has a Plan for us all,” but I do believe that about 70 percent of was [written] by Chris.

SARAH: Yeah, yeah. I mean, Tommy’s done a lot, I mean they’re both absolutely amazing, because they’re both from theater. They’ve got—pardon the language—but they’ve got degrees and this and that and just everything. Oh, actually I changed the language, but I was going to say something else [CB laughs]. But they’re just so well educated and they know everything that they’re doing, and I just think they’re amazing composers. It’s just such a shame that we never got to get the Sarah Jezebel Deva project out, but like I say, none of the music will be unused, because it will get used in Angtoria.

CB: Sounds like the two projects have almost melded.

SARAH: Yeah, totally.

CB: So then this [Angtoria] is actually a band, it’s not a side project?

SARAH: No, no, no. You’ve got to bear in mind that I’m session with Cradle. Although Cradle’s always been my priority, I’m not a full band member, you know. So Angtoria was always my main aim—any band was always an aim to be a front singer, you know, a front woman and have my own band. And a lot of people have viewed Angtoria as a side project, and it’s NOT a side project. And it’s because they think I’m a member of Cradle, but I’m not. I mean, Cradle is still top priority and will be for quite a while. I started [singing for] Cradle when I was like 16, 17 years old; I’m now almost 30, so it’s a big part of my life. So letting go of that will be really, really hard, but Angtoria’s definitely not a side project, but when we’ve got more time, then it’ll be a proper touring band and hopefully people won’t look upon it as a project.

CB: Well yeah, of course people associate you with Cradle and all the various other things you’ve been singing with [Therion, Mortiis, etc]. So how is it different singing for your own thing where you’ve had such a huge part of the creative process, and of course the lyrics and the whole idea. When you’re actually singing, how does that change for you?

SARAH: We haven’t done any shows—ask me that question if you interview me in a few years [both laugh], ‘cause I have no idea how it’s going to be like as a front woman performing. As a front woman having to take control of the melodies, writing lyrics and the expression side and not being told what to do, it’s actually a breath of fresh air. With Cradle I’ve written a lot of my parts—not lyrics though, because Dan [Filth, vocals] takes charge of the lyrics—but I’ve come up with my own ideas that have been used and a lot of my melodies and stuff like that. And it’s been good, but it’s always been under the direction of somebody else, and that somebody else has the final say. Wheras with Angtoria, I could sit back with the music and think about what I wanted to write about. There was no rush. I didn’t have to also think about image or anything like that, like, ‘Oh, what are people going to think if I write this, and do I write about vampires,’ and stuff like that. Everything that I write about is stuff that was really close to me and other people that I’ve been around. And I didn’t feel any pressure when writing, because I just felt that it naturally came from the heart. Next album, I don’t know what I’m going to write about. Singing, again, I was in control of my melodies, I was in control of whatever I was singing and I didn’t have to sit back and ask permission. So that’s good, that’s really, really good. But then there’s also the pressure of being a front woman that everybody’s going to judge me. When I’m doing ‘oohs’ and ‘aahs’ with Cradle of Filth, I’m not being judged; it’s Dan that’s being judged, because he’s the main voice. I’ve been singing, like I said, for Cradle for such a long time—it’s been twelve years—that I’ve constantly been ignored as a backing singer. But that’s good, because that’s comfortable for me and it’s less scary. I know that when I get on that stage tonight, the focus isn’t going to be on me. With Angtoria the focus is on me, because with every band, the lead singer unfortunately is the main focus. You kind of forget that there’s other people in the band.

CB: They’re the conduit, right, between the band and the audience. They’re the person that connects them [not that I agree with it either, but I’m trying to justify ‘fan’ mentality!]

SARAH: Yeah, yeah. While I understand that, I do think it’s wrong that the lead singer gets all the praise. And I don’t want that to ever happen in my band. I want that to be—there are five people in Angtoria [and]  you treat us all the same. There’s many instances—and it’s not because I’m jealous or it’s hurt my feelings—but I’ve just learned that there’s many times when we could all be walking to the bus, and insert a named singer, they’ll all be screaming after him or her and ignore everybody else in the band. And I’m so against that, because without the band, there’s no lead singer. Without the band, there’s no music. And it really annoys me and I don’t ever want that to happen in my band. I do slowly feel the pressures of being a lead singer, because like I say, all the focus is going to be on me for everything that I do, the way I look, the way I breathe. But who knows? I don’t know how I’m going to handle it when it’s full on and we’re going to be touring and videos are out there. Again, ask me when we’ve done shows. I think the reason that there’s not so much pressure right now is because we haven’t done shows. But I don’t feel any pressure on the way I should be with people, ‘cause at the end of the say you take me for who I am, you take the band for who they are. We’re not out to impress anybody, we’re just doing music and that’s all we want to do. We’re just doing music and that’s all we want to do and leave a dream, you know. If that makes any sense!

CB: Yes! [Both laugh] That can be another song, on your next album, “Live a Dream!”

SARAH: That would be slightly gay, though [Laughs].

CB: That would be more Power Metal.

SARAH: Yeah, there would have to be a few dragons thrown in there, as well.

CB: There you go. So where did the band name actually come from?

SARAH: Oh, I hate this question because I always forget. I didn’t make up the band name. I do believe [Laughing]—people will completely mock me for this, not knowing where the band name comes from—but I do know that the first part is Chris’ mother’s name and the last part is his sister’s name. So it’s pronnounced ‘Agnetha,’ but it’s ‘Ang,’ not ‘Agn.’ And then Victoria [Chris’ sister], so that’s the ‘toria’ bit. So that’s the Angtoria, that’s where the name comes from. And also Tommy’s old band—I don’t know how you spell it—Moahni Moahna, they had a song, I do believe, called Angtoria [on album “Why,” 1997]. I’m not too sure, I’ve never asked them. And we were stumped. We didn’t know what to call it, I came up with these names, they could have been really shit and it might have sounded really gay, and I put some ideas across and to be honest, I didn’t have a clue what to call us. You pick a name, you’re judged for it forever and you’re stuck with it forever. Unless you’re Prince, and you want to change your name to a symbol [Laughing]. If we’d have done that, that’d have been really stupid. So that was the best idea that they came up with, and I was like, ‘Okay, elt’s just go with it.’

CB: But it’s a good name because it doesn’t say anything specific about the style so if you change your style completely, it will still be applicable.

SARAH: Yeah, yeah. Chris also said that if you search [the Internet ] for ‘Angtoria,’ you’ll pull up Angtoria sites, whereas if you look for ‘Cradle of Filth,’ you’re going to find ‘cradle,’ you’re going to find ‘filth.’ Which is great for some guys, I suppose, and some girls. It’s funny, I did a search for ‘Metallica’ not too long ago—I found Metallica Paint. Nothing to do with the band. You know? It’s like, our name obviously is very, very original and if you search for us, you’ll only find us. So it’s good.

CB: Speaking of the Internet, you’re very active on the Angtoria web forum, answering the questions and so on. So how important do you think it is to stay on that leve with fans and really interact?

SARAH: Really, really important, because if it wasn’t for them, we wouldn’t be where we are today, and a lot of bands forget that. A lot of bands really do forget where they came from and where they got there. I’m not saying that you’ve got you’ve go to invite fans ‘round for a cup of tea and a quick cuddle, I’m saying give them a bit of your time. Sometimes it’s hard because people want way, way too much, but I just think, as long as you’re yourself and you’re natural and you’re honest, then I think it will take you far. And you have to know when to say ‘no.’ So on my forum, I know a lot of people there already, so I have no problems calling them a ‘wanker’ or [saying] ‘shut the fuck up,’ because we’re all a community and we joke around. Now, if you’re an outsider and you’ve never seen that forum before and you see me calling someone a ‘fucking bastard,’ excuse my language, you’re going to think, ‘Ah, she’s a right bitch.’ No, because that’s what a forum is; it’s a group of people talking honeslty, and they’re “Internet friends,” you know? And people should know that they came come to me and say virtually what they want. And that’s cool with me. They can say things about my appearance, like ‘How do you feel being big?’ Well, I’ll be honest, I’m not going to be offended by it. ‘What’s Dani like? Is he a real asshole?’ Again, I’m going to be honest and say what I think—to a degree. I just think, fans want that connection with you and if you spend your time ignoring the fans and giving them the middle finger, it’s not going to do you any good. And what does being nice cost you? As long as it’s not taking up 12 hours and 59 minutes a day, what’s two hours a day when I’ve got the time, being nice to people and giving them something to go away with? I’ve always been like that, ever since I started Cradle of Filth, I’ve always been like that, and I don’t think I’ll ever change, either.

CB: So what about your video [“God has a Plan for us all”]? That was really…uhh, I almost shit myslef! [that was mean to be complimentary]

SARAH: I think it was still securing spots in places. I don’t think—see, okay, if I go back to why we have that, the record company wanted “God has a Plan for us all,” ‘cause it wasn’t going to be the original album title. “Do you see me now?” was going to be the original album title, ‘cause that also matched the imagery of Toni, Dani’s wife on the front cover. So we then decided “God has a Plan for us all,” because it kind of just displays—I mean, “God has a Plan for us all” is a play on words. I’m not religious at all, but I believe that if there’s a god, and this is his plan, the way society is, it’s pretty sick. This girl is displaying neglect, poverty, abuse—everything. So God  has a plan for her, and that’s her plan, kind of thing. The record company said, ‘We want the record title to be the video.’ I didn’t want that. I wanted “I’m Calling,” but he said, ‘No, album title,’ because I’m assuming that names sticks to people and then they can go into a shop and say, ‘“God has a Plan for us all,”’ you can find it. It’s a marketing thing. It is very explicit when you look at it in detail. You know, there’s a girl cutting her wrists, it’s about a girl being sexually abused by a priest. I didn’t pick that subject to be controversial or to shock people or to sell albums, or to do anything. I know people who have been sexually abused—I know loads of people that have been sexually abused, or raped. I know people that have been sexually abused in the Church, and I thought, ‘Well, why close your eyes to that? Why is that such a problem?’ Deal with it, and at least doing something like that would bring it into the open. The bit where you see the girl’s demise—she ends up slitting her wrists—a lot of people take child abuse as, ‘Oh well, that happened to you.’ People have got NO clue whatsoever about how it affects you in your life, so I wanted to show many different aspects of what child abuse can do. The church that we filmed in, they were so helpful and they were totally with us. They completely agreed that it goes in, there’s too much cover up [and] they wanted to bring it into light. There was a few other churches that weren’t agreeing with it. Why would you not agree with bringing child abuse—in general—into the open, unless you’ve got something to hide. And that’s the thing, again like I say I’m not religious, but I think religion is very narrow-minded. There is two sides to every story. And I believe that the reason it hasn’t had much air play—not just because we’ve got a small record company and stuff—but I think people don’t want to play it because they’re worried about the backlash. People who haven’t got a clue about what they’re looking at might view it as an attack on the Church, and it’s not. It’s not an attack on the Church. I’ve actually had a lot of religious people, mostly Christians, say it’s absolutely brilliant and they’re really, really pleased to see something like that and they believe it should be on MTV. But for some reason, no offense to Pink, it’s alright to show her video where she’s in the toilet putting her fingers down her throat. It’s okay to have a video on during the daytime when kids are watching and you’ve got your fingers down your throat—you know “Stupid Girl?”—but you can’t show “God has a Plan for us all,” because it’s too whatever. But we’ve had a good reaction from the video, everyone seems to love it and we’re just hoping for more airplay and that will happen in time. And one day it will get released onto a format anyway.

CB: I don’t know if you have to get going [now]. SARAH: Yeah—is there anything else? CB: Parting words for your fans? SARAH: Please buy the album! And hopefully we can tour Canada soon!

Interview conducted by Clare B.